The Question:
I recently found out about my husband texting and talking to two girls and buying gifts for another one. He tells me that he knows these girls from work and they are in contact with him just for networking. Does it make sense to you to network with office people after 10:30 pm, discussing personal things? Maybe I don’t understand that, and that is why I can’t believe him. I want to believe him that these girls are from his work but all the time I am thinking in my mind that when he goes out that he is lieing to me. I don’t want to leave him because I don’t think it will be easier for me to find a man, as I am a very simple person and I can’t flirt like my husband and other girls do. So I have decided to just live with this man instead of being alone. But my problem is how can I make myself to feel like I don’t care what he does, who he talks to and who he is with when he is not at home. Please tell me how I can stop caring for his actions and just believe that this is my life now and it is better then living alone….
My Response:
Dear Alone;
There is such a thing as NETWORKING. Networking involves people outside your work, if you already work with them there is nothing to discuss once you leave the office, let alone text late at night about personal stuff and buy them gifts. You need to be confident in yourself and believe that you can find someone much better than your husband. Never stay in a relationship just because you are comfortable and just because you think you can not find another man. There are plenty of other men out there, you need to have respect for yourself if your husband has no respect for you at all. You cannot just make your feelings go away, you can’t just sit at home pretending you don’t care that he might be out there with other women. Living alone is not a bad thing, maybe you need to live alone for a little in order to find yourself. You are clearly lost, because no women should be cheated on and then have to sit back and watch. If you care it is because you love him, and if he is cheating on you he clearly has no regards for your feelings or your love and you deserve someone who will not cheat on you and be honest with you. Being alone is not the end of the world! Stand up, be strong and have respect for yourself. You deserve so much better. Trust is very important in a relationship and you clearly have lost the trust in your marriage, without trust and without an honest spouse you cannot move forward, and you cannot just pretend that everything is okay. If you have family or friends use them to lean on them during this hard time, if you don’t have family or friends it is going to be harder to move on and move out but you have to be strong for you. Life is too short to live an unhappy life and to live a life that is filled with hate and no love. Love is strong, and I believe that no matter what there is always someone out there for someone.
xo,
kristin nicole
I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com
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