Advice Column: What should I do?

 

The Question:

What should I do?

Ok so, I’m a guy. This girl and I are best friends, but she has a boyfriend. I like her a lot, unconditionally and conditionally, but just a little. But for some reason it bothers me that they’re dating. It may have to do with me fearing for our friendship. I don’t want it to end; I enjoy being friends with her. I feel like she’s going to give her boyfriend so much attention the she may just…well…forget about me. I care for her a lot (not like a creep more like a best friend). I value our relationship as friends a lot, and she does too. I’ll end up staying away from her some days because sometimes I’m too bothered. I know that it is wrong because it’s the complete opposite of what I should be doing, it also would make her feel guilty. I don’t want her to feel guilty because she’s done nothing wrong. I don’t know what to do….someone help.

(Edited)

My Response:

Dear Guy Friend;

You like her unconditionally and conditionally? I am not sure exactly what you mean by this. It sounds like you truly want to be friends with her but there may be a part of you that may like her more than just a friend. If you truly like her as a friend only you shouldn’t feel jealous about her relationship with her current boyfriend. It sounds like you are a bit confused about your relationship and you need to sit back and evaluate your feelings for her. Be honest with yourself and be honest with her. You can’t have your cake and eat it too (I know that sounds cliche) but it’s the truth. You have to understand that both relationships are different. If she is truly your best friend she isn’t going to forget about you just because she is hanging out with her boyfriend. Does a friendship change when you are in a committed relationship? Yes. That’s life and it is something you have to understand. If you have done nothing wrong with her than there is nothing to feel guilty about, on either side. This sounds like a balancing act, you have to recognize you are only friends, and accept that you are okay with that. Be honest with your feelings about this friendship and then go from there.

xo

kristin nicole

I found this question on Yahoo.com