Dear Kristin Nicole;
My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years and I just found out that last summer he slept with another man. He says he is not homosexual or bisexual that he was drunk and it just happened that one time, but I don’t know what to believe. How drunk can you be to not only cheat, but to cheat with a man? (the same sex). I’m so confused right now, I love him but I feel not only betrayed and lied to, but I feel like he isn’t telling himself the truth. What if he really is homosexual? Do I break up with him or do I believe him and forgive him?
Dear Same Sex;
I think there are definitely some unresolved emotions that your boyfriend might be trying to hide. Let’s start with the fact he cheated on you and leave out the part that it was with another man. He Cheated on YOU! Enough said….At the end of the day, drunk or not he cheated on you. You were in a relationship for two years and he has lied about it for the past year. How do you know this was the only time he cheated on you let alone with another man? Now going back to the fact that not only did he cheat on you, but he cheated on you with another man is just confusing in itself. If he doesn’t understand it, then don’t beat yourself up trying to understand it yourself. He is obviously confused or hiding feelings of homosexuality that he doesn’t want to share. Some may say, it was just a one time fling and he was really drunk, but others may say he is homosexual or bisexual and he just doesn’t know how to come to terms with it. I would sit down and talk to him, but more than likely he is going to become defensive and say that he isn’t homosexual and that it was just a drunken mistake. The facts are he cheated on you, and it was with another man. Do you want to stay with a guy that doesn’t know what he wants? You deserve a man that won’t cheat on you and a man that isn’t confused about his sexuality. I know it’s hard because you have been together for 3 years, but it’s better to find this out now than down the road when you are married with children. Move on and find yourself a real man!