The Question: Cheating boyfriend
He cheated on me after we’ve been going out for 5 months and we were best friends for years before that. He was my everything! We were together every day and we did everything together. I’m so lost and I miss him so much it hurts. He hurt me so bad and I know we need time apart (he hasn’t even exactly tried getting me back yet) but I can see it coming in the future. We said our goodbyes but I don’t want to live without him and my mind set right now is saying that I’ll see what he has to say whenever that may be.[sic]. No matter what happens I can’t forget that he put me through HELL, I cried for 48 hours straight and I hate him for what he did, but he was my first real boyfriend. I lost my virginity to him and he was the first guy I have ever loved. I still love him so much and its like the saying “what do you do when the only person who can make you stop crying is the one who made you start?” [sic].
Please help, what should I do?
(Edited)
My Response:
Dear First Love;
Its hard and it’s not going to be easy because he was your first real boyfriend and you lost your virginity to him which is something very intimate. I went through the same thing you did, my first love cheated on me and went back to his ex after we dated for over 6 months. It hurt like hell, and you feel like your whole world is falling apart, and you feel like there isn’t anything you can do to make the hurt stop. I know it feels like this now and I know in a way forgiving him to just have him back in your life may sound easy, but it’s not.
He broke your trust, he betrayed your love in the worst way possible, and this is something that is unforgettable. You can forgive him, but it’s something you will never forget, and it will always be in the back of your head. If he hasn’t tried apologizing now or trying to get back with you by now, he just doesn’t care. I know it’s hard to hear, but guys like this aren’t worth your time. I understand he was your best friend before that, but even friends don’t betray a persons trust. If he didn’t feel the same way about you that you felt for him, he should have been honest, more of a man and not a boy who would just go cheat on you with someone else.
You have to be strong! If he tries to talk to you one day, hear him out, forgive him so that you can move on, but do not under any circumstances GET BACK WITH HIM! You need to have respect for yourself, getting back with someone who would hurt you in that way isn’t going to make you feel happy. There are ‘plenty of fish in the sea’, so to speak, time will heal and you will find someone else, even if right now it seems hopeless. Trust me it’s not! As to your question of the saying ‘”what do you do when the only person who can make you stop crying is the one who made you start,” You move on! Because if the one person that you think can make you stop crying is the person who made you cry, they aren’t worth your time or energy, they don’t deserve your love.
xo,
kristin nicole
I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com (2010)
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