What do you do when you’re really sick of being married?
I’ve been married 12 years, but my husband and I have never had sex. He can’t. He doesn’t even try anymore (he never really did). We separated for 4 years because of it. People say he must be gay… We got back together a few months ago because I felt divorce is a sin…And sit or get off the pot, ya know. But nothing’s changed. I thought I could deal, but now I don’t know. What’s worse, he’s dirty and messy. He doesn’t shower or brush his teeth enough. I look at him and think Ick. I’m turned off but still don’t want an eternity of celibacy. Sigh…I really don’t want to hurt him. But I’m only 38 and I’d like a normal sex life.
What can I do?
I normally say try to work out, communicate with him what you need, but 12 years is a long time, why you stuck it out this long is beyond me, and why you married a man that wasn’t at all affectionate or intimate with you is also beyond me. You said you have never had sex with your husband? I am not sure what to say about this…. He either has issues with his member or he is in the closet, but why he would stay in a marriage where neither of you is happy is again “BEYOND ME”…. I know you think divorce is a sin, but you are still young, and no one should live in a marriage where they aren’t happy, where they are celibate from their own marriage, you are missing all the fun, all the intimacy moments to have with your spouse, to share and love and grow. You are still young, you need to move on, get out there and find a man that knows how to satisfy your needs. You need to LIVE, we only live once and life is too short to stick around someone you aren’t even happy with. Like I said I normally say try to work things out if you love him, and communicate, but this looks like a lost case (12 years) is a long time, it’s time to get off the pot like you said, and move on! Love yourself and find a man that will love you back.
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