The Question:
Well i have this guy friend, and we’ve been friends for nearly a year and a bit. The problem is that we are seeing other people and when they went away for vacay, we got closer to each other.
We never talked very much and he was a really good listener when i had guy troubles and he would give me advise on how to go about it.
After that, he said nice things to me, saying that i am an awesome person and ill always be here for you and what things like that,. (not to mention he always asks about me and my boyfriend)
Thing is now, he and his girlfriend and things are kinda complicated for both of But what struck me most is how he said to me ” I think its safe to say now that i love you ( in a friendly way, of course) ”
When he said that, that’s how it all started.
And now has he also has been saying that “your in my wonderland” and that he is ‘thinking’ about him and me but wont tell me anymore than that. He also keeps asking me if I’ve missed him, but i cant really deny it because i have.
Ive tried not to picture us together, and I’ve tried staying in the friends zone, but its the things he says and the way he makes me smile that i cant help but do fall in love.
Can someone tell me what to do. I’m so confused. Please help? xoxox
My Answer:
Dear Complicated;
It’s complicated. At his moment you are both in a relationship and if you are having feelings for your friend then perhaps you need to take a break from your current relationship to sort your feelings out. You don’t want to hurt your current boyfriend. Your friend also has a girlfriend and needs to decide what he wants to do. If he’s telling you all these things and giving off hints, he probably isn’t going to come up to you and tell you straight out how he feels, you are going to have to confront him. You also will have to make a choice, if he does truly like you more than just a friend, you need to decide whats more important, your friendship or trying to see if things work out more than just friends. Unfortunately sometimes it’s hard to be friends with another man, but it isn’t impossible, I’ve had many guy friends who have never been anything more than just friends, but in rare occasions feelings do change, and sometimes it’s just mixed feelings because we tend to confuse True Love with Lust or True Love with just loving a person/friend. It is possible to love another man and not be in love with them or visa versa. You have to take into consideration that if you do try to make it work beyond friendship and it doesn’t work there is a possibility that you won’t stay friends, in rare occasions to ex’s stay good friends, sometimes things are too awkward or you simply move on with another person, this is something you need to think about. Be honest with your friend and ask him what’s up? Once you have your answer you are going to have to make a decision. Good luck.
xo,
kristin nicole
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