About two weeks ago my husband told me that he doesn’t love me anymore, that the reason why was because I wasn’t keeping up on the house and it started eating at the love. I tried with the house but 5 kids and being pregnant it was hard, but after a few days he wanted to work this out. So we got back together. A week ago I had to deliver my baby girl at 16 weeks as a still born, so now I am going through the pain of losing my daughter. After losing her I felt like things just weren’t going to work out with my husband and I, and he kept telling me things will be okay, that he does love me and we will get through this. Well last night a week the day the doctors told me my baby was gone, he said that he can’t do this, he can’t make his self love me, that by now there should of been some feelings coming back. I told him it just doesn’t take a few weeks, but he said they won’t come back, that he just keeps lying to me and that its killing him. I’ve told him lets go talk to someone but he said no. Everyone keeps saying that their might be another woman but I looked into it and this is not the case. I just wish there was something I could do to make him love me again. I shouldn’t be going though this right now, and I know he’s hurting over the baby too but we should be helping each other out. I’ve told him that I’m his back bone and that he’s mine. I really just don’t know what to do. I love him so much. That its going to hurt not being with him…
Finding out someone doesn’t love you anymore after building a life together, having children, losing one, is the second hardest thing you are going to have to go through (the first — Losing a child).
You can not make someone love you, and having more time doesn’t make someone love you either. It’s hard and it hurts but do you really want to be with someone that doesn’t love you back, someone that doesn’t love you the way you love them? I agree that this is the time you needed to get closer to each other because of your baby, however, him having these feelings of not loving you anymore happened before this. I think he should have told you sooner before having so many children and you getting pregnant again, but men are cowards and perhaps he didn’t know how to tell you how he felt. He might have thought time would change his feelings too, but in time you only realize that if the feelings aren’t there, they aren’t coming back. Sometimes we do not understand life, and sometimes we have to go through the hardest times of our lives alone. I am sure you have family and friends, start leaning on them, because your journey has just begun. You have to be strong for your other children, respect yourself enough to let your husband go. You deserve someone that will love you the same way you love them (unconditionally), someone who won’t have to wait to love you, or think about loving, just someone who just LOVES you.
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