I find questions about relationships everywhere, Answers.Yahoo.com, Help.com and more. I find these questions interesting, some I’ve been through myself, some I’ve given advice to friends about, if you have similar questions or know someone who needs advice please send them my way, and I will give them the up most honest opionion anyone can have.
Me and his ex both know each other, and she used to have jealousy towards me and really didn’t like me at first. Now she’s OK with me, so I think. We don’t talk at all, but she still talks to my boyfriend. I told him I don’t have a problem with them talking as long as she respects our relationship. We’ve been together for almost two years, and a couple times in the past he told me that she said dirty, sexual things to him. I asked him why he still talks to her and why would she say stuff like that? And he says, oh I don’t know, she also got mad at him b/c she thought we broke up. So obviously she’s not respecting our relationship..but why would she think that we were broken up? I feel like he keeps telling her that we’re not really together just so he can stay talking to her. He never lets me see his phone, he never wants his ex to see us together, and it’s like he’s scared to stop talking to her. I don’t really think he’s cheating on me, but I think he’s lying to me about a few things, and it’s my fault for letting it happen as much as it has. He’s with me way too often to be cheating on me with her, and I have seen a couple of texts from her, just not all of them. Can I have some advice on what i should do and what your opinion is?
Dear real advice,
First off let me ask why the ex girlfriend had to like you, and why there was a problem with you? Of course she didn’t like you, you were the new girlfriend in her EX boyfriends life, you are the one that shouldn’t have liked her and had the problem with her; NOT the other way around. Second, why is your boyfriend still friends with his Ex? He doesn’t want his Ex to see you two together? And the Ex thought you were broken up? Where did she get this information from, if not from him, if he isn’t cheating on you and there is nothing to hide, why is he hiding you from his Ex? These are the questions you need to ask yourself. If he respects you and knows how you feel about it then he shouldn’t be friends with her. I don’t care how the relationship ended, it ended for a reason and there is no reason to stay friends with an ex. Staying friends with an Ex only causes problems in the current relationship. If your boyfriend is being honest with you about the text messages that doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s not cheating on you, it doesn’t mean he is either, but why does he continue talking to her if he knows she is sending him these messages? The Ex Girlfriend is not going to respect you and that really isn’t something she needs to you, (she obviously doesn’t care by sending your boyfriend these text messages) you need talk to your boyfriend, have respect for yourself because right now your boyfriend isn’t having respect for you.; continuing to talk to an Ex knowing it bothers you and continuing to receive these text messages is wrong on all levels. Tell him how you feel and tell him that you do not want him talking to his Ex anymore, if he respects you and really loves you and wants your relationship to work, he will stop talking to his Ex girlfriend. If he doesn’t, then you need to re-evaluate your relationship and ask yourself if you really want to be in a relationship where your boyfriend doesn’t take into consideration what you feel?
Hope this helps….