I’m supposed to be getting married next Saturday, and I’m freaking out, I’m getting cold feet, and I don’t think its the right thing to do. I have known my fiance for 10+years, we have been dating for 3+years and we have a child together who will be turning 2 in June. I love my fiance, but I’m not in love with him anymore, make sense? I don’t feel the same way I used to, we hardly ever are romantic towards each other. …. we fight a lot, he calls me a ***** and a bunch of bad names, I just don’t know. I mean I’m a 25 yr old woman… but why cant i decide? I’m so confused…. someone please any advice?
Dear Cold Feet or Not Cold Feet;
It could be that you are having cold feet, or it could just be that you aren’t in love with this person any more and it does make sense. You can definitely love someone but not be ‘IN LOVE’ with them. Sometimes we just fall out of love. This is something you need to figure out though, if you really aren’t in love with him anymore and you aren’t happy, this is the time to call off the wedding, do it now before it’s too late. You are only 25, you are still young and have your whole life ahead of you, you have plenty of time to find Mr. Right. I guarantee Mr. Right won’t put you down and call you names, that is very disrespectful and you have to really take into consideration if this is the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with. (Can you picture your life without him?? He’ll always be in your life because of your baby, but can you picture your life not being with him romantically?) I know you have known him and dated him for a while now, and the fact you have a child together bonds you for life, but that doesn’t mean you have to live an unhappy life and marry the guy. If you can’t decide and you already said you aren’t in love with him, I take that as a pretty BIG SIGN, That getting married just isn’t for you, at least not with this guy. Be honest with yourself and stop the wedding before you do something you later regret. If it is cold feet, you would know you really love him but that you were just scared, so I don’t think this is the case. Look at your life, is this the way you want to spend it forever? You deserve to be happy and be treated with respect, if you aren’t feeling those things, then something must be wrong. Take a good look at your relationship and decide because after Saturday getting married is a lot easier than having to get divorced.
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